Great mind

Do you know that is hard to be me??

My mind always playing with me...

when people changed, even with the slightest motion...

i've feel.."is there something wrong??", "are you hate me??" or something bad like that....

and...

i can like, predict it.. like "if he/she feeling like this, then................."

well sometimes it's true

sometimes it isn't

then... when i feel like this, i'll try to endure.. and keep it to myself.... i don't want to tell them....

but, if we don't tell them, they will not understand...

BUT...

if i told them,,

and their changed (even in the way i want)

i feel like they were not sincere, this is not them...

i feel bad...

it's like i forced them to changed...

So, what do i want??!!!!!

Hell, i don't know...

what a GREAT MIND!!!

*Fucking eh... i'm really sorryyyyy!!!!! huhuhuhu..

Sleepless Night

Another sleepless night

Another Deep thinking

Another fear and prediction

Another tears

Another.... and the other

So... tired....

Fate of Flow

The glass has fall,

The glass that surrounding me, keeping me safe...

has fallen..

i didn't deserve such a beautiful glass...

and now... i'm flowing

with no direction...

no guides..

no thing...

Facing the world, full of uncertain..

learning something new..

purifying myself..

till i deserved that glass...

Lingering Mind

Wednesday, February 25th

I think my trouble has already gone...

I'm sorry to caused this much problem... but that's me.. god has blessed and cursed me as well with this super sensitive brain... i can't help it... 

i still think, "How long are you gonna tolerate this??"

"you done so much for me!, and what can i do to pay you back?? by having negative mind on you!!!"

"I feel that if i keep doing this, you'll gonna regret for having me as a friend"

so.. that's the reason why i kinda trying to separated from you

i'm too afraid of being a burden..

i need to learn not to depending so much to other people..

especially when they didn't really need you...

Listen....

I love u guys so much!

but i still think i'm just a burden, a responsible for you...

so, please... if you really feel this...

just stopped all your pretending!

because i loved you enough to leave you...

if you ever feel this...

PLEASE TELL!!!

Sorry

I'm really sorry...

I've know that this hurt...

i didn't mean that...

i really do...

i need you..

but you wont need me...

i can't lived in the world where i'm not needed...

because, there's part of me.. that really scared

really scared...

from being abandoned...

why??

i think i don't need to explain that anymore...

Personality Quiz..

Hey again!!

I've just took a personality quiz on the internet...

well i've took several before... but this quiz has the perfect answer!!

it's describe me perfectly...

get yours! : 
http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

Your view on yourself:
Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education:
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

This quiz is so true, because i've been really sad if i had no one to share.... i've always depending other people... independence is important to me! is sooo right!!!!

The Brand New Me!!!!

Hey hey!!!

i want to explain why i put that lyrics in my blog...

well, you've see...

i'm trying to be new now!

i'm trying to not depending on other people

i'm trying to be independent!

i'm trying not to be anyone's burden

i'm trying to opened myself to anyone...

so,....

I'm a new soul coming to this strange world...

Hoping I could learn a bit 'bout how to give and take
But since I came here, felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake...

I'm sorry for my past mistakes..

and i'll try to be better...

I'll try so hard for this one... hehe...

X)...*It's still hurt tough, for now...*

The New Soul, New Adventure

I'm a new soul
I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit 'bout how to give and take
But since I came here, felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake

La, la, la, la (21x)
La, la, la, la (21x)

See I'm a young soul in this very strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit 'bout what is true and fake
But why all this hate? try to communicate
Finding trust and love is not always easy to make

La, la, la, la (21x)
La, la, la, la (21x)

This is a happy end
Cause you don't understand
Everything you have done
Why's everything so wrong

This is a happy end
Come and give me your hand
I'll take you far away

I'm a new soul
I came to this strange world
Hoping I could learn a bit 'bout how to give and take
But since I came here, felt the joy and the fear
Finding myself making every possible mistake

New soul... (la, la, la, la,...)
In this very strange world...
Every possible mistake
Possible mistake
Every possible mistake
Mistakes, mistakes, mistakes...

Macbook touch! *intermezzo*

When i was searching on some random video in youtube... i saw something that amazed me..

i was like.. "wow!! is this s#!t is for real??"

what is it??

well is the future (i hope!) product of the apple. inc.. it's called....

"MacBook Touch"

Oh my gosh!! this is soo cool!!

check out the garage band... it's just like real piano...

MacBook touch surely will be equipped with apple's famous performance... hooo.. and maybe some brand-new feature like on screen keyboard, shake detector, and maybe some new feature that we don't even known.. hahahaaa..

When i see this, i just want to buy it and trade it with my MacBook... but, hey... i've bought this laptop for like, 2 month.. and i want the new one already??

gosh! this apple.inc's designer & marketing strategist are sure as smart as hell...

My Four Seasons

Spring

Summer

Fall

Winter


Started from melting ice, warm breeze, bird chirping and flower start to grow... that's spring, when everything started... everything looks good, and comfortable... the atmosphere begin to warm-up.. i braced myself to go out.. i encourage my self to enjoyed the nature, i started to feel warm and good... i was relieved to getting such warmth.. i'm starting to walk, talk, and opened myself to welcoming the goodness of nature

Then, everything start to coming alive, the flower was blooming, the river was flowing beautifully and the animals was doing their courtship. it was summer baby! the weather is beautiful, windy, no rain. i enjoyed my time there... i really do.. it was warmer and better.. i was so happy with this.. i've run, jump, swim and even climb! sometimes its just to hot because i'm so excited and happy! all of this because i finally find my place to live!

well that's what i thought, but suddenly.. the temperature was dropping, leaves starting to fall, animals started to gather food, and the wind was cold... but i still try to looked for some warm.. i tried to not feel the cold air rushing trough my skin... i'm trying to make everything look normal even when the leaves is falling and falling... i'm sad... but i'm still trying to pretend that its was summer.. i'm still tried to run and jump.. but thats just making me more cold...

and the snow is coming... there's no leaves... no animal.. nothing... i'm just alone in this world... but still i tried to get some warmth, i try, i really do... but the wind is so harsh and the temp is so low, what i get is just tiny sparkle of fire, it's so cold.. and i'm alone... i can't walk, i can't run.. i'm alone.. just alone.. i find nothing to warm me up.. i'm dying in this situation.. can't feel a thing... 

and now.. i'm still in the harsh condition... buried in the snow.. can't feel a thing.. please.. don't be like this... i don't want to be a heartless person... i need someone to pull me up in this harsh season.. and take me back to spring....

will u be that person??

Troubled me...

Please Understand..

I love you guys, i really do!

I Wanted to be with you guys, i do!

I really loved and missed our past together...

but, well i said its past...

now, everything change...

now, you already find your own happiness...

i can't let myself be at your way...

i don't want to be your responsible...

i'm afraid that... this is the time that we're must parted away...

it hurts for me to do this...

because i still need you guys, i love u so much!

but... i know that you guys didn't need me anymore..

i know that u guys still try to hold me..

but for what...

i'm not needed anymore...

i'll just be a burden for you guys...

i don't want that...

so, i'm really really sorry..

for doing this...

please understand..

that i didn't blame you

it just the condition...

it just fate.. that brought us into this bridge...

that must i crossed alone...

so that you guys can be happy...

don't be sad...

i wont leave you...

if you'll ever need me...

just reach my hands..

and i'll help you with all my might!

please don't worry...

it may be very hard for me to be apart from you guys..

but i'll survived

for i.. had done this before...

...........................................................................

this isn't a goodbye, my friend...

but i must say farewell

hope you'll find what you're looking for...

in each other... 

and i'll be watching you from here...

far... from you..

Hey All!!

Hey all...

this is my brand new blog from me...

I'm sorry because i created soo many blog before.. and it all just stopped...

well, you see.. it just because what i feel isn't the same anymore.. with the blog i've created...

so, i've been trough some trouble... and i've decided to make another blog...

So, this is my new blog.. it's called the Vast Ocean at  Mind or Voam...

i called this is voam it because i realized that my mind is really big and spacious... and i need some flexible blog's title to support it....

so this blog is vast ocean...

because we never knew what will come beyond that sea....

it may be bad..

but, it might be good..

and that's what we must believed

hope you'll liked it...

notes : this blog is full on english because i wanted to improve my english language..